Thursday, January 31, 2008
310108 - Meet My Class
The above photo is a photo of my class with our Orientation group IC's, Jestina (spelled correctly?) and Waqiu (Wa-Q). Jestina is sitting next to me and Waqiu is the guy in yellow. The guy he's pointing to is our principal, Mr. Liu. Not everyone seem happy in this photo cause we're just getting to know each other.
Anyways, today was alright, except time crawled by. Mostly because of mothertongue which lasted 3 periods... Urgh... And at the start of the morning! Also had 3 periods of D&T. I got 9.5/10 for one of my sketches. 9/10 for another and 8/10 for another one. YAY!
Tomorrow will be cell group at Joel's at 3pm. Gotta leave the house 45 minutes before the metting time. So I'll have to leave at 2:15. Good thing is that tomorrow, school lets out at 12:40PM! Thank God... So saying I catch the bus on time, I'll reach home at 1. Then I'll bath, eat, change. Should finish all this by 1:45. Then I still have half-an-hour left. Shall use that time to pack my bag. If there is time, shall complete my weekend homework so I won't have to worry about it on Sat and Sun.
Tomorrow will be fun, I suppose. Fun but tiring.
Posted by B at 6:51 PM
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
300108 - Trouble-Maker, Am I?
Visited my Miss Bay's blog just now. Gosh, didn't realise that our class caused headaches... Whoops... Shall try to behave better in class...Anyways, today's timetable was: 1 period of science, then one period of Exercise Time which to me also means "time to get made fun of by boys because of my speed" time. Followed by 2 periods of Geography. Yay! Then one period of reading time with Miss Bay which was used for... Hmm... Can't remember what it was used for. Then recess. Stayed in class again. Boys played with broom, dust bin and a bottle. Teacher fom next door came in, looked DIRECTLY at me, although she was scolding everyone else also.
I DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING! Anyways, then had 3 periods of english. Can't remember the last time I did a comprehension though... Got at least 3 wrong... URGH! Shall get full marks next time! X3
Then followed by 2 periods of mothertongue where a small part in my mouth bled. The skin tore, don't know why, it kept bleeding. Ernest called me a weirdo because of it. Jodie is consistently being turned off by it and a lot of people are asking what happened. So this is the explanation people!!
Slept quite late last night. I used my computer this morning and apparently left it on until I came back from school... Which is now. So gonna get a scolding from parents if they find out. So... no telling everyone. No telling... Or else you're a snitch. A bad one.
Posted by B at 2:12 PM
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
290108 - I'm Torn Apart Between 2 Worlds
As I walked home today, I was listening to my MP3. I realised that some of these songs reminded me a lot about... me being torn between two worlds...And it also reminded me of what my teacher from the drama enrichment course asked us to do. She had us walked around the room yesterday. Then she told us to close our eyes and think of something sad. She told us many examples, we lost a friend, someone died. But my memory was nothing like that.
I thought about how some people couldn't accept me for who I am. Which just brings me back to the people discriminating against me for being boyish. I had memories, of people telling me to change. Asking me why I was like this... I saw their faces... And I was shocked when I realised some of them were from church too. I know change is good and is the only constant in life but maybe not right now.
And then I thought, most of them weren't from my previous school. I thought about how I just fitted in right there. So perfect. Everything just fell into place back then. I was... happy. With friends like Lin Zhi, Ryan, Carolyn and Wei Yin.
And now, I hardly see them anymore. I realise that all my time is being spent either at church with cell group, at home or at school. One, there are people discriminating against me in church. Two, Ayron still insists that I become more lady-like. And three, at school, there are even some guys thinking the same way.
I can't even find one place where I can just fit in with the boys and no one says anything. I sometimes wonder whether going to church was the right choice? And I wonder, all my successes, would they have occured even if I didn't go to church? I mean, I have no guarantee. I can't go back into the past to check, right?
I'm torn, really, I am. I discovered today that in my class, only 2 people are against me right now. 1 is just playing, the other is serious. And I'm glad. That it's almost all over.
Alright, back to the dramam enrichment. When the teacher called for us to open our eyes, I did and I realised that everything was blurry. My eyes had filled up with tears, but they just didn't fall down my face, so that isn't consider crying.
I thought about how I just wish for this class to be like 6F. I still like this class just the way it is though ^^
Today, towards the end of the day, I felt so lousy. Especially during Geography. It's my favourite class and I act so sluggish today. No idea why. When I was asked to answer something, I felt something. As my name was being called.
I just felt so far away. I felt that part of my brain was concentrating and the other part wasn't. There was this pulsing in my chest as if I was lost. I felt so sad and... JUST SO SAD AND UPSET!
It is said that if you want to change others, you must first change yourself, right? But how can I stop people from discriminating against me? What can I change? My boyishness? Now THAT is out of the question. No way, no how.
Posted by B at 6:29 PM
Monday, January 28, 2008
290108 - Lyrics
Eh, got bored. So now I'm just posting the lyrics of my favourite song from each Good Charlotte album. You will notice that the lines which mean a lot to me are bold and have been italicized.Good Charlotte's 'Screamer':
Verse 1:
Communication is a lot like the wind
When I speak, it's like no one understands
And I'm left with empty hands
Forever, I can't speak.
So many things I'll never learn
You can't cross bridges that you've burned
Chorus:
Why is life such an issue in your mind?
Why are the answers to my problems hard to find?
So hard to find... So hard to find...
Verse 2:
Don't forget to buckle when you fall
Beneathe the pressure of the seconds when your life became a screamer
Staring at the sea, things become so small
I want movies of my dreams
And pictures on my wall
Pictures on my wall
Chorus
Interlude:
You say that I'm a dreamer, I say you're a non-believer
Take out the light.
Take out the light, start screaming
I'm dreaming... And I'm a dreamer
No one believes me
And you don't either
Tell me what to do
Take out the light
Take out the light
Take out the light
Take out the light, start screaming
The Young & Hopeless' 'Moving On':
Verse 1:
When I think about my life
I wonder if I will survive to
Live to see 25
Or will I just fall?
Like all my friends, they just keep dying
People around me, always crying
In this place that I like to call my home
Interlude:
Not everybody knows that everybody goes to a better place
Not everybody knows that everybody could be living their last days
But the hard times will come
And we'll keep moving on
We're moving on
KEEP MOVING ON!
Chorus:
Life
Hope
Truth
Trust
Faith
Pride
Love
Lust
On without the things we've lost
The things we've gained, we'll take with us!
Verse 2:
And all I've got are these 2 hands
To make myself a better man
I wonder if I'll ever see the end of this
With all this rain, it just keeps falling
On my head and now I'm calling
Out to someone else to help me make it throug
Interlude
2nd Chorus:
Life
Hope
Truth
Trust
Faith
Pride
Love
Lust
Pain
Hate
Lies
Guilt
Laugh
Cry
Live
Die
Some friends become your enemies
Some friends become your family
Make the best with what you're given
This ain't dying, this is living
The Chronicles of Life & Death's 'S.O.S.':
Chorus:
Is anybody listening?
Can you hear me when I call?
I'm shooting signals in the air
Cause I need somebody's help
I can't make it on my own
So I'm giving up myself
Is anybody listening? Listening...
Verse 1:
I've been stranded here and I'm miles away
Making signals, hoping they'd save me
I lock myself inside these walls
Cause out there, I'm always wrong
I don't think I'm gonna make it
So while I'm sitting here, on the edge of my death bed
I write this letter and hope it saves me
Chorus
Verse 1:
I'm stuck in my own head and I'm oceans away
Would anybody notice if I chose to stay?
I send an S.O.S. tonight
I wonder if I will survive
How in the hell did I get so far away this time?
So now I'm sitting here
Cause the devil's about to get it's meal
Say a prayer
Please, someone save me!
Chorus
Interlude:
I'm lost here!
I can't make it on my own!
I don't wanna die alone!
I'm so scared...
Drowning now...
Reaching out...
Holding on to everything I love
Crying out...
Dying now...
Need some help
Chorus
Good Morning Revival's 'March On'
Verse 1:
Don't cry
Open up your eyes and know
Someone else out there that feels this way
I'm singing to you
Cause I know what you've been through and
Not so long ago I felt the same
Chorus:
Like soldiers
March on
If we can make it through the night, we'll see the sun
March on, march on
Verse 2:
And I remember summer nights alone
Fire was the only thing we own
And all we had were dreams of California
And I remember winters were so cold
Hunger was the only thing we know
And rock and roll dreaming was what saved us
Chorus
Interlude:
Till we see the sun
March on
Till we see the sun
Through the good times
Through the bad times
Through the long days
Through the hard nights
Keep on, till we see the sun
Chorus
Even when there's no one there for you, march on
Even when the days are hard for you, march on
Like soldiers, march on!
Posted by B at 7:24 PM
280108 - DRAMA!
An actress is about to be born! I'M IN THE DRAMA CLUB! Whoo! Although I am a little upset that I didn't get Infocomm, I'm still excited to be up on stage acting again! YEEHA!Anyways, not much happened today. School. You know? First 2 periods, Civics & Moral Education. Then 2 periods of Literature. Then 2 periods of P.E. WHOO! And then recess... And then 2 periods of English. Then one period of Character Developement. And then assembly.
Had the Drama Enrichment course today. Went quite smoothly. I was a friend, a sister and finally, a brother. As a brother, I went shopping with my brother, Don. We went shopping for a bra for our mom. I had Don put on the bra. Didn't look too good so I just pulled it off him. HAHA!
By the way, to all Guarani/1N2 mates, any of you got Waqiu's (Orientation Group IC) email? I just remembered that I still need to get some orientation photos from him. Xu Hao already gave me two. But I think there's more?
Posted by B at 4:49 PM
Sunday, January 27, 2008
270108 - Mini Skirt
I wore a MINI SKIRT today... And the reactions I get... Man... Started with yesterday. Lokies set up the outfit for me. A long sleeve shirt with a mini skirt. Wore it and was freaking cold in the church!!Anyways, Dr. A. R. Bernard came and preached a great message!! When we receive Christ and the Holy Spirit, it is not us carrying their power. We are the power. That's why we are secret agents representing the Kingdom of God and ambassadors of Christ.
And reputations!! Unbeknownst to us, we are subconsciously forging a reputation. It can be good, it can be bad. As secret agents and ambassadors, we MUST be conscious of our reputation and the reputation we're setting for the church.
I can't be a stumbling block to a person who needs to know it is possible to overcome circumstances and be more than conquerors. My reputation is a revelation of myself.
Also, something caught me. Dr. A. R. Bernard said: "How I live today will determine how I am remembered tomorrow." Those were his EXACT words. I remember it so clearly.
Also, after service, we met up with our ex-cell group. And people were fussing about me in a mini skirt. And Lokies was like: "Of course she looks good! I prepared her outfit!" Christina was screaming and shouting. Dorothy was like: "WHOO! Belle! My student! WHOO!" and Lynette was like: "Gloooorrryy..." And I can't remember exactly who but 4 people clapped for me just because I wore a skirt.
I remember the last time I wore a skirt to church (I was threatened with no coke for a month). It was lime green and not a mini skirt but still above the knees. And after service, Joshua ANNOUNCED: "Look everyone! Belle is wearing a SKIRT!" And Schumann mocked me by saying: "Look everyone! The blue moon!"
Oh yeah, I remembered that. Then we went over to NTU for lunch. Had fish and chips again. NTU is sort of becoming our "Changi Airpot" back when we were still at the Expo. Anyways, talked about... stuff. Played with Sap's new phone. Then met up with Elyn's cell group at Jurong Point.
COFFEE BEAN! Haven't been there in MONTHS! We took one small corner and played games. Laughed so hard till I couldn't even speak properly! Then came back home and well, that's the end. -Sigh- Can't believe there's school tomorrow. Oh wells... Should be fun with the drama enrichment course. ^^
Posted by B at 7:54 PM
Saturday, January 26, 2008
260108 - Random
I have three realms regarding my stories. First realm is the "Anime Realm". Full of fan fiction like Naruto, Bleach, Prince of Tennis. Mostly Naruto though. Second realm is the "WWE Realm". Full of fan fiction about my favourite wreslters. And the third and my favourite realm, my own created realm named "The Tigers". The first realm I started on was the "WWE Realm". Haven't written much WWE recently though. The second realm I started on has the most stories in them. The "Anime Realm". I created my own characters and inserted them in.And the most recent realm is "The Tigers" realm. It is a basketball team I created. With 10 members. ^^ Only one girl on the team, she is also the youngest. Sounds a bit like me, huh? It shall come to pass!! ^^ For the past week, I've been doing stories on these 10 members. One story for each member. Ezekiel, Josh, Jake, JJ, Matt, Chris. So far, I've only completed Ezekiel Christens and Josh Matthews is in progress. Moving rather slowly, don't you think? But, busy, busy, busy.
Lokies, Joel, Joey and Shyang Zhi slept over last night. Watched Hitch. In Chapter 10, I knocked out. Had to go to school today for a talk on Humanities, the English Language, CCAs and all that stuff. Hard to keep awake... I slept at 1:45?
Watched Over the Hedge with Lokies just now. It's been a while since I watched it. Then I was happily using my computer and Ayron and Lokies came into my room to prepare Ayron's outfit tomorrow. Lokies has been bugging me about wearing a skirt AGAIN! Thanks for your sympathy... He was like, "You really should wear it again! It's such a nice skirt, pity it has to be locked up in your wardrobe."
Grr... ANYWAYS, going to church tomorrow. Rev. Dr. A.R. Bernard is coming!! HE IS MY FAVOURITE SPEAKER!! ^^
Posted by B at 1:50 PM
Friday, January 25, 2008
250108 - Cell Group, The Past is the Past
As most of you can tell, I was super angry just now. About the whole asthma thing. But on my way here to Joel's house, I listened to my MP3 again. And I once again listened to 'Moving On' by Good Charlotte. And then I thought, the past is the past. And why should I be angry at how they react? Why? It's their own lives and attitudes.Letting go off the past is something I'm not very good at. That's why I find myself constantly listening to Moving On by Good Charlotte. I find that it helps me. A lot. Anyways, our prayer meeting is starting in a while. Just a quick blog to share what I experienced on a BUS! The past is the past. And that's why it's called the past because it has past and we should leave it behind us.l
Posted by B at 7:48 PM
250108 - Sexists in the World, Asthma
The world is full of sexists. Discrimination. Girls think that girls shouldn't do guys stuff. And (sometimes) guys think the same way also. But I am so thankful that all the guys I know aren't like that. Well, most of them anyways. They seem to be fine with me acting like a guy and all. It's the girls, you see. Not all. Don't think there are any left in my class. There is one in particular. I don't see her everyday. Nor do I see her every week. Quite seldom now actually. Shan't be naming any names.She thinks I shouldn't be who I should be. That I should be a bit more like herself. Ah, forget that. Anyways, now about asthma. I was hoping no one in my class would find out about it but since they already have, I'd just like to blog about it.
After exercise time today, I was panting (of course) and my shoulder was hurting a lot. This pain in my shoulder is something I've never experienced before and this is a first. I brought my inhaler today and put it with the wallets. I forgot to take it and a teacher held it out to me. And since we were all sitting down, a lot of people could see it. It was high above our heads.
Before I even took it, I could hear the word 'asthma' being repeated over and over again. Mostly from the boys, but what the heck? As I took it, I quickly took a puff and put it back in my pocket. In class, the expressions on people's faces... I can't explain it in adjectives. But mostly, I'd have to say I saw pity in their eyes.
Instead of the usual shouting I did in class, I kept quiet. As we walked up the stairs from exercise time to the class room, people kept asking me the same darn question: "Eh Belle, you got asthma ar?" HELLO! If I have the inhaler, isn't it obvious??
I really didn't want people to know about it. There's nothing wrong with having asthma, I know that. But why must everyone be so curious? Is is because they just found out the fastest girl in their class actually has asthma? Why must everyone keep asking that question?
During recesses, I just walk down to get a drink and walk back up. As I was walking back to the classroom, ice lemon tea in hand, I saw three boys walking towards me to go down the stairs. I can't remember who. But I saw the looks of pity on their faces. As if they were trying not to say anything wrong.
Instead of me playing around with my classmates in the earlier part of the day, they just kept away, especially the guys. It was as if, they wanted to keep away just in case they said something wrong or upset me because of my asthma. If so, just let me say that I appreciate the intentions, not the actions. Even during math class, I thought it was all over. All behind me. But then SOMEONE just HAD to ask me: "Belle, you really got asthma ar?"
After I replied with a very frustrated but 'calm' yes, this SOMEONE just had to continue with a "Oh, since when ar?" I was really getting irritated. I'm not ashamed of asthma. I see it as a challenge for me to keep being who I am, without breaking down, passing out or giving up.
I've had asthma since I was 10. I've had it for 3 years now. And so far, I've done pretty well. I've had a few serious incidents but I just always bounce back. Once, I played basketball so much until I was down on my knees, panting and gasping. No matter how many times people ask me: "Are you feeling alright?", I just bite back the pain and say yes, I'm fine.
I don't want to be a person who will say: "No, I need a doctor" immediately after the first close call. I want to see how far I can go! How far I can go without treatments, medicine or the inhaler. Every single time after exercise time, except this time, I'd get back to class, panting. And the question: "Are you feeling alright?" will come out of people's mouths.
I just reply in a half-shout, yes. The guys stop making fun of me, which just made me feel worse. I want them to stop the teasing but NOT because I have asthma and they pity me. I don't blame anyone for my class finding out that I have asthma. I don't blame anyone.
You see, I'm not angry nor frustrated because they found out. What I'm so pissed at is how they react! The looks of pity, the curious voices, the questions which make it seem as if I'm weak. The very question I hate is: "Are you feeling alright?"
If it's in terms of emotional well-being, I'm fine with that. It's when they ask that question regarding physical fitness that just makes me feel so angry. And the same SOMEONE always asks that. I'm never, EVER, going to break down, pass out or give up. Asthma is one of my circumstances. And I'm determined to be MORE than a conqueror.
Posted by B at 1:45 PM
Thursday, January 24, 2008
240108 - I'm There, in That Situation
I was just thinking. I was reading one of my past works. About a best friend running away to continue her dreams. She finally got her dream and now she had to continue it. But, her best friend, he hadn't found his dream yet. She knew that he would only find his dream if he stayed, so she had to convince him to let her go.The story was ended in tears. He had finally learned to let go off her. She was like a elder sister to him and she was his only friend. He lost her and as I was reading it, I found myself wanting to cry as well. It was like I was the guy who just lost his best friend. She was everything he had. I honestly felt like crying...
And I thought, why? Why would I want to write something so depressing? But then, I read down to one part where the girl was promising the guy that they would meet again. That friendships like these never end. That for the mean time, he'd have to be brave and stand. She told him that he wouldn't have to stand alone. She'd be with him in spirit.
I know it's stupid, but I don't know... Could these characters actually be so real to me that I feel that they are here in physical form? Or is it because all these characters have a place in me that I feel I need to test? I don't know what the answer might be but I sometimes find myself talking to them. Like out of no where, while writing a story, I'll like suddenly say: "What do you think, Kit?" or "Man, what should happen next Sug?"
It's stupid, I know. But it feels so right. It feels so perfect. Like I really have them with me. And they are friends who will never leave me. It feels a bit scary when I say that, but, I don't know... I really mean it. I find myself in these situations sometimes. And I just edit it a bit and put it into a story. I suppose you can call the story I just mention the memory of the last day of school at Lakeside. I find these stories very easy to complete.
I'm now working on another one where they reunite after a few years. But that one is a bit more challenging to complete. I suppose it's because I haven't been reunited with my own friends n Teachers' Day. ^^ No matter, shall try completing it now.
Posted by B at 9:48 PM
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
230108 - Ministry
Oh yes, I forgot to blog about this just now. Ministry. I was really confused about this... Usher, book store, children church, nursery or what?! Urgh...But then, this afternoon while walking into Parc Oasis, I saw two little toddlers walking home. The little girl's bag was unzipped and I told her. Since it was troublesome for her to take it off and zip it herself, I helped her. She smiled at me and said thank you. So did the little boy. It was a simple gesture but it rewarded me.
I suppose I do like children. And children aren't exactly terrified of me. I mean, I have four baby cousins. And I do babysit them from time to time. Maybe children church is the place for me? But I think someone would think I was attending children church! ^^
Posted by B at 4:02 PM
230108 - Normal School Life
Went to school today. Had one period of science first. Then Exercise Time. Ran 1.2km. Which is actually less than our primary school mass runs. I got my timing for each of the six rounds. First round, 42. Second round, 48. Third round, 50. Fifth round, 50. Teacher said it was good cause I was keeping my pace! =p Sixth round, 47. I managed to cut off 3 seconds from the last timing!! WHOO HOO! And secondary school mass run is different. Instead of 4 classes, there are only 2. And the boys from both classes go first. Then the girls! AND I CAME IN FIRST FOR EVERY ROUND! Except for the second one, Min Jei came in first for that one, me, second.And I realised that there is one thing I really like about school and its when a teacher can remember my name. Most of the teachers can and now even my chinese teacher!! Shall explain why later. Yup yup, now only Ms Rina, literature. Ms Ja`aranah, art and Mr Gan, P.E. Strange thing about P.E. is that most of the time, we switch teachers. So it's not Mr Gan all the time.
Alright, for english, we did group work. Assignment was to act out one of our personal recounts. So we used mine. I used the personal recount of the "Hi West" mixed with the Breakaway! Youth Camp! ^^
We did pretty well I suppose. Then came Chinese. DOOM. Anyways, last Thursday on the 17th, we had to do a composition about ourselves and our lives. Our families, ours hobbies and talent. At least one page. I managed to do it. And they came back TODAY! I got higher than Crystal who, to me, is a chinese genius! I got 21.5/30! And guess what?! The highest in class is only 0.5 higher than me! 22! I came in second! SECOND!
Man! Can you believe it?! A Chinese reject like me getting in 2nd place?! Unfortunately, I wrote that I was a tomboy in the paper and she read it out. Which is fine actually. But in chinese, tomboy is: nan ren po. Which sounds just so awful. So Ernest just kept repeating it just to bug me.
Posted by B at 2:33 PM
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
220108 - Sorry Guys!!
Sorry for not blogging for so long!! No internet = No blogging. For the past few days, Ayron and Ayrton hadn't been able to get any internet connection as well. So... Well, now there is on Ayron's com so... HALLELUJAH! I'M BACK AND BLOGGING!!First off, I'M 13!! Oh yeah! Officially a teenager!! Cell group celebrated it with me on Friday the 18th. Lokies, Sara and Joel got me a gorgeous bling bling puppy shirt which is so me but is poor quality. After three days, the bling all started falling out... And we didn't even use the machine to wash or dry it. All was by hands and by the wind! My poor shirt!!
Sara got me a little crystal bear from precious moments. And a book mark with a Bible verse on it! And she was the one who made my birthday card too! Lokies, Sara and Shyang Zhi slept over and we went running the next morning on my actual birthday. Then we went swimming. First time in a few months for me, first time in 18 months for Lokies. Then on Sunday, the 20th, celebrated with the ex-cell groups. Dorothy got me a name plate and a 'B' which stands for BRIGHT! (Fong, don't you DARE laugh!)
Hau En made me a card too! Not everyone wrote in it though... We headed on over to NTU to fellowship where we talked about our childhood mishaps when we were younger and stupid. Haha! So much fun. And do you know Lokies used to play with BARBIE DOLLS?! Tsk, tsk, tsk.
Returned to school on Monday (of course) and had P.E. Our P.E. lesson consisted of us running away from school and jumping over a drain. Don't wanna blog much about Monday but rather about TUESDAY! Ah, yes.
Today, I was a student, then a civillian, then a ghost and finally, a werewolf who became a ghost again with other ghosts. And all the ghosts will have to do a weather report during the next Geography lesson. ^^
I really don't know what to say except sorry for not blogging for so long!! The last time was SIX days ago!! I'll try to not let it happen again!
Posted by B at 5:36 PM
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
160108 - School...
I don't think I can take much more of school... True, I do have some good friends but most of the time, people are just making fun of me!! Plus, waking up early still leaves a bad effect on me... And you know, sometimes wanting to be who He has planned for me to be in the school ain't so easy... The only good things I like about school is P.E., English (of course), Science and Geography. And Literature and Art! ^^ Math is so-so. Not too bad I suppose.Anyways, started today off with Science. Learnt about Kingdom Plantae. Learnt about Kingdom Animalia yesterday. Then we skipped Excercise Time to select our 5 CCAs online. 1st. Infocomm club. 2nd. Drama. 3rd. Scouts. 4th. NCC Air. 5th. Choir.
Those are my five choices. And I'm regretting putting NCC Air as my 4th choice. I am now wanting to put it at 3rd. Anyways, went back home of course. Took ANOTHER nap. Taking naps after coming back from school is a habit for me now since I can't use more than one hour on the com... Anyways, my time is up! XD
Posted by B at 7:37 PM
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
150108 -
Just finished dinner. For some unknown reason, my computer cannot connect to the internet. I've tried everything... Anyways, went out shopping for a BED today. No luck. All of them are too tall to my liking.Didn't do much today. Because, duh, it's a SCHOOL day. Where you don't do a lot except study. I'm so sleepy right now... Man... And guess what? It's only week 3 of school and already the 'rumours' are starting. People saying I like some boys, some people saying some boys like me. It's stupid stupid stupid!! We're only 13 for goodness sake!! All these 'relationships' are just: You like me? I like you! Let's go home together! That type of 'relationship'.
It's so idiotic... Today's lesson went by sllllooooooooowwllyy... Real slow. Thanks to MOTHER TONGUE! Grr... Hate that subject... Had art lesson which was pretty fun. But no P.E. so... Yeah.
Tomorrow shall be another day. THREE PERIODS OF ENGLISH! YEEEAAAAHHH!!! But also mother tongue... T-T
Posted by B at 6:29 PM
Monday, January 14, 2008
140108 -
My room is in a complete mess. Moving furniture, throwing stuff away. Hectic... So I'm using Ayron's computer to blog. Thanks bro! Anyways, today went by fast. And KINO GOT SHAVED!! She looks like a Labradour now instead of a Golden Retriever!! Her hair is so short!! She looks so white and thin!!Anyways, didn't do much today. Abhishek and Fong suddenly came over. Good thing they did. Abhishek helped me with my Science work and Fong just distracted me from it. They left at 9 or so Abhishek will be going to a class chalet tomorrow. 3 days, 2 nights. Lucky dog...
Didn't do much today but fuss over Kino's "new look". And complained to my mom that she is supposed to be a GOLDEN RETRIEVER and not a LABRADOUR!! The reason my mom wanted her hair cut was because she was shedding too much fur. But still, Kino is still shedding fur. The only difference is that it's short fur now...
Wells, gonna help my mom pack up mym room now. Later y'all!
Posted by B at 9:18 PM
Sunday, January 13, 2008
130108 - Tired...
Went to church earlier today for Bible Study with Dorothy. Can you believe it? One more lesson with her and Kelvin shall be taking over. Oh wells, today was Getting Started Lesson 9. Fellowship. We ended around 10:20AM. Then we queued up for seats. W363 got some pretty good seats today!! The closest slope to the stage and first row too!Today is the preaching of the second 'F', FORGIVENESS. Just this morning, I was telling Dorothy that it wasn't easy for me to forgive. Definitely not easy. And recently, I've just been thinking back to the past, my past school, my primary school friends. And then, Pastor Tan said that we cannot embrace our future if it is in the clutches of the past.
And then, he went on to say that the reason people don't do certain stuff is because we don't see the value in it. This reminded me of one time, I was telling Enrique that I didn't care about PSLE. Maybe it was because I didn't see the value in results?
Anyways, how do we forgive and forget? 4 steps:
1. Give up the right to get even.
2. Learn to set boundaries.
3. Respond to evil with good.
4. Repeat these steps when necessary.
Yeah... I think what I will have trouble with is step 1. Looks like it is my "circumstance", but, I shall be more than a conqueror! Yeah!
After service is the Outreach program. We played from 2:40PM to 4:15PM... Dog tired. First clue was a picture. It was at the swimming complex. So we RAN, yes, we RAN all the way over to the swimming complex. We took the picture and met with the game master at the track.
Next stop, Pioneer Mall, Giant. We met with Hui Mei there. She gave us a list of things. First item on the list is a small little life-saver sweet. The other items were difficult. Life, a small part of a star fruit. And the clue was: Starry Starry!! It drove us mad!!
After that, we ran all the way to the park near block 826 where Lokies and I shouted back and forth to each other. The game master was Cynthia!! She divided we six, Joel, Joey, Lokies, Shyang Zhi, Sara and I into 2 groups. One group stood at one end, the other group stood at the other.
The first group, Lokies, Sara and Shyang Zhi, had to shout a tongue twister message over to us and we'd have to shout it back. Lokies shouted it alone because we thought shouting as a group would be too messy.
So Lokies shouted: THE BROWN BEAR'S BLOATED BECAUSE OF BROWN BROWNIES AND BLUEBERRY!
So, I shouted back the exact same thing and we got 20 points!!
Then we went all the way over to Best Coffee Shop where Joel ate an entire LEMON! EWWWWWW...
After that, we ran all the way to the basketball court where we had 3 minutes to score as many baskets as we could. 1 basket is worth 2 points. We got 12 points! Not bad, eh?
Then we walked to this little Hawker Centre, fairly far away where we met up with Edwin. The task was simple. One of us had to take a photo of the remaining members, while we were in the air. First 2 tries, someone's feet were on the ground. The last try was perfect! We jumped all together and SNAP! the camera went! We then trudged back to the church and our team got in 2nd place!! YAHOO!
Snacks as prizes. First place went to Hui Mei's cell group!! So we shared the snacks. Yum... Ayron didn't join us though. My eldest brother, Ayrton and his girlfriend, Jaslin, came to service today so Ayron sent them back home. And he didn't return...
Anyways, we were all dog tired... I felt like I was about to faint!! But I took a quick, cold shower and that refreshed me immediately! Okay, homework's done, I'm refreshed and ready for school. Ready but reluctant. But then I remembered something. Ayron, Christina and I were on the MRT. Ayron said: "Life sucks". But I thought differently. I figured that life sucks only if you think it to be. So, if I think school sucks, surely it does. So... SCHOOL ROCKS!
Posted by B at 6:37 PM
Saturday, January 12, 2008
120108 - Deep Sleep... Zzzzz...
I just woke up from my long, long, long nap. Okay, first thing's first. Woke up around 9:30 or so. And then I used the computer for a while. Even at 2+, my flu from yesterday just refused to go! I finally gave in and turned to medicine. I took a Panadol Cold Relief pill. Was awake for a while more, watching T.V. I was waiting for the drowsiness to set in.And it did. So I slept at 3 or so. So, I've been sleeping for 3 hours!! How am I ever gonna get to sleep tonight?! Oh wells... Didn't do much today... Just slept. And before I even got sleepy, I was already on the bed, just trying to sleep. So, I told myself to use that time to think. Think about what is currently happening right now.
I don't have A LOT of friends at school. And none of them are particularly close with me yet. Boys tease me to no ends, making me feel like I just wanna punch their head into the wall XD I hardly talk to the girls, my teachers are great but the classes are boring and I am now really confused on which CCA I should join!!
After the CCA Orientation yesterday and visiting the NCC booth, I wasn't so keen on it. Now, my "choices" right are: Infocomm Club, Scouts or Drama. And if all 3 happen to NOT work out, I shall have no choice but to join choir again. Choir right now is sort of a back-up choice.
Oh wells, my time is up. Gotta get off the com now and go eat dinner! SPAGHETTI! YUM! XD
Posted by B at 6:31 PM
110108 - Happy Birthday Lokies!
Today was... rushed. Firstly, I leave school at 5 today. But we were released late. Cell group meeting starts at 8 so I thought Ayron and I would leave around 7:15 or so. Apparently, Ayron wanted to leave at 6!! SIX! When I got home, it was already 5:30? I still had to bath and pack my bags and all. Fortunately, we managed to leave on time. We got to Joel's around 7? Earlier than that?ANYWAYS, then one by one, we all arrived. Along with 4 Koreans joining us!! I forgot how to say hello and goodbye in Korean already... ANWAYS, Cynthia joined us too! Kelvin preached about VISIONS today. Without visions, we shall perish because visions give us SIGHT!
After the meeting, we celebrated Lokies' birthday. Now that it has passed, I can now announce this: KELVIN CHOSE SARA AND I TO BE THE BIRTHDAY CO-ORDINATORS!! Sara buys the gifts and I do the cards!! ^^ So when Lokies told me over MSN that it'd be great if I could rise up to be the next Hau En, I was worried sick that he might have found out somehow!
And the Koreans said I was cute!! KYA! Lokies got cake smudged all over his face, he got a wallet, a shirt and a "The Lord is my Shepherd" um... paper weight? Ayron is staying over at Joey and Joel's house with the other guys. I wanted to too but... *Sigh* I'm a girl. So mom fetched me and now, I'm home blogging. Going to sleep now peeps. Night nights and a very Happy Birthday to one Lokies!
Posted by B at 12:21 AM
Thursday, January 10, 2008
100108 - CCA Orientation. I Have Fallen In Love. =3
I am in love with drums. I'm afraid of D&T.Before I carry on, let me explain everything. Today and tomorrow will be the CCA Orientations. The seniors will prepare these booths to tell us about their CCAs. We can then think about joining. All the CCAs are seperated into 4 Clusters. Uniform Groups, Performing Arts, Clubs and Sports. Today, my class saw the Performing Arts and Clubs. Tomorrow will be UG and Sports. Alright, onto explaining the D&T thing.
Today was my first D&T lesson. We went to the workshop. It was everything I had imagined it to be. Then Mr. Wong told us about the safety rules. Then he told us why the rules were so important... BY TELLING US TERRIFYING (But true) STORIES ABOUT THE INCIDENTS THAT OCCURED IN THE VERY ROOM!!!
A girl got her hair pulled off. A guy got his finger cut off. A member of the staff too!! And a guy got his entire fingernail cut off. Taking 2 months to grow it back... Blood... MAN! I'm freaked out!! I can't wait till June when we start Home Ec instead of D&T!!
Yeah, anyways, after school, I watched the Basketball Team play basketball. It just made me wish I was back at Lakeside with my friends, playing. We're not allowed to bring our own balls to school. Then we lined up and got ready to see the CCA Booths. First stop, Library. Where we visited the Science and Technology Club. They are awesome!! They got so many awards!! Then we went on to the Infocomm club right outside. I was really interested in this one. At the Infocomm introduction, it was then did I realise my boyishness was so obvious. I was sitting with the guys and then Amirul was like: "Why you never sit with the girls?"
And then Ernest shouted from about 2 seats behind: "You don't know meh?! She tomboy!" HAH! And he thought that would get me mad. Well, it didn't!! I'm really confused!! So many people think I'd be insulted, being called a tomboy!! I'M NOT! I'm PROUD OF IT!! Then we went on to the performing arts where I fell in love with drums. The ferocious sound!! KYA!! I wanna learn drums!!
So far, the CCAs I'm considering are: NCC, (Surprising, I know) Drama Club and Infocomm Club. Hopefully, I shall enjoy NCC. I was just thinking, in Primary School, I always wanted to be on a "physical" CCA. But, all I've joined is Art Club, Cross Stitch and Choir. But NCC! Man! We'll be marching, we'll be shooting, we'll be sailing. YEEHA!
Posted by B at 6:12 PM
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
090108 - (No Title)
Only today did we start our school lessons. It was ... interesting, I suppose? For P.E. today, we were having our height taken. I'm 155!! I grew 1 cm!! Yeah, then time for English. We were suppose to bring a item we cherish. I brought a bracelet. But then, Ms Bay said we could even use a picture. So, I have this printed out picture of Cell Group in my file so I used that instead. And everyone was like: "What's a cell group?"Haha! My teacher knew so she explained it to the class. Yeah, then we had to write down a memory relating to the cherished item. My memory was the BBQ. The one at Bukit Timah Rengency? Is that the name? Ah, anyways, yeah. I wrote down: We played soccer and I got hit twice by the ball.
I can't remember if it was on the same day, but I also wrote down that we played Blind Mice. HAHA! BOY! That was fun! I was the mice once. I put on the blind fold and from the calls and shouts, I was quite close to tagging Joshua so I was following all their instructions. Then they said someone touched the ground, so I took off the blindfold and low and behold, Joshua was sitting on the pole right in front of me. He was above the ground. Like a ninja from Naruto or something!! Haha!!
Yeah, anyways, and before that, we had science and Geography. Quite fun, I must say. And then... THE DREADED CHINESE!! YAH!! I honestly had absolutely NO idea what the teacher was talking about. Mdm Wang... Wang Lao Shi... URGH!
And she called me out randomly and asked me to read some words. I went nutso! So I told her I couldn't read the words and some boys were like: Aw hor...
So, Mdm Wang was like: (In English) You cannot read the words?! Then just now why never pay attention?!
I TRIED! I paid attention but I really just could not understand her!! Why are most chinese teachers old, female and strict?
Yeah, then came home. So, here I am, in front of the computer. Off to go to some website now!
Posted by B at 2:45 PM
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
080108 - My Father's New "Restrictions" & I HAVE NOT SAT NEXT TO THEM!!
I didn't blog again last night because, although the house painting was done, there was, for some reason, NO INTERNET! And apparently, it was because, the plug was not plugged in. Now, as I blog this, Auntie Emely is using the measuring tape on my bed. I might be getting a new bed!!My father's new restrictions. One, only able to use computer one hour a day. But I can buy Ayron's hour so I have 2 hours. But don't think I can afford it. My mom SUGGESTS that I should go to bed by 9. Actually... Those are the only real restrictions that bother me.
ANYWAYS, Christina, Joel and Jin Hong came over to swim today. I didn't want to go at first, but in the end, I did anyways. After that, we came back to my house, I find my room in a MESS! My bed is gone, my wardrobe is facing the window and... there are A LOT of painful stuff on the floor. Anyways, Christina shared with us some Cocoa with marshmallows the size of a quarter of her fingernail. I didn't get to eat any and my throat and tongue were burnt!!
Then we went out for dinner... Ah yes!! I remember, at the swimming pool, we were talking about people we have not sat to during service. Let me see... Schumann, Wei Lun, Chin Ming, Kevin, Elyn, Li Ming, Joel, Jin Hong, Potae, Pepsi, Enrique, Jouis, Willy, Warrick, um... um... Ano... Who else? I've sat next to Chin Pin and Andrew too... Hau En? Yeah. I don't think I've sat next to Hau En, ever... Mei Qi also. Adrian also. Christina ONG. Sap, I think? Shaun!! Joshua's friend, if you have forgotten... Yeah, I think that's all... Aw... And those who are not in the same cell group as me, don't think the opportunity will come so often now!! WAHH!!
Haha, at least I'll get a chance to sit next to Joel, Li Ming and Kevin! Haha! And, now, Auntie Emely is vaccuming the floor so I can sleep on it tonight without getting poked by sharp objects. And... Well... I gotta like, get off in 5 minutes. My last hour on computer will be up soon. Night guys!
Posted by B at 3:01 PM
Monday, January 7, 2008
070108 - House Painting
Blogging from my Aunt's laptop. Thanks much San Yi! I'm over here at my grandparents' house because my own home is being painted... And I'm not even allowed in. I got home after school, thinking about how good the shower was gonna feel. As I walked towards the door, I saw Auntie Emely sitting outside, eating. I am then being reminded that the painters were supposed to come today. And they won't be done until 6-7pm. I got back at 1:35PM. And waited until 3:45? Then my mom came to fetch me and Ayron over to our grandparents' house. So I am now clean and dry, blogging on my Aunt's laptop. Thanks again San Yi!My Aunt's room really makes mine seem like a dump. There's a desk, a bed, a bedside table, a shelf, wardrobe and a small coffee table. And there's also a connected bathroom. And on the desk, there is a small pen holder. There is a calender and a photo frame. There's a lamp (of course) and her laptop (HOORAY!) In front of the desk is this long board where she sticks up encouraging notes and reminders.
Her room is so neat!! And tidy! And spacious!! And although its one of the smallest rooms, theres so much space to walk around in!! WOW! Okay! I am convicted now! To making my room like hers! No more procastinating! Time to tidy up my room! And what better timing?? My room is being painted! The good thing about my Aunt's room is that the wardrobe is connected to the room itself. And so is the desk.
But I love her bedside table the BEST! It's so cute really! There's some space at the bottom, shelves and cuboards. -Sigh- Alright! I'm gonna make a goal! By the end of June,(I know it's a bit long, but I need my own time for music and sports now) my room should look like hers! YES! Gonna get rid of lots of stuff! Gonna stuff all my soft toys into a box and put it on top of my shelf! Except for one or two. Hee... Then I'll clear out my table. Clear out my books. Give all the unecessary stuff to the needy or I can sell away those stuff which can bring in more money.
Yes... A garage sale! Yes, yes. Alright. Today. Met my english teacher. She's turning 19 this year. She'll teach us until May and then she'll go on to University. Miss Bay. And at first, on Friday, I was nominated to be monintress. But I refused it. But after Joel and Ayron spoke to me about rising up, when Miss Bay asked for a volunteer for an English Rep, I raised my hand immediately if not sooner! How bad could it be, right? And english is my favourite subject.
So I became English Rep. And during P.E. today, we were paired into groups of 2. Randomly. Then 2 teams would step out. There'd be a ball. Objective is to pass the ball to your partner to and fro as many times as you can. I was paired off with Cherly. And the teacher asked for my name!! And Emely's and Amiru's too! Could it be, maybe, we're the better players?! Those hours of playing basketball has paid off!
Yeah. Then went for recess and all. Then wentfor assembly. Having to wear the ... TIE! Which practically CHOKED me!! ERGH! Yeah. Then went home, house painting, came over here. Chatted with a few people and now I gotta go. Will blog about WHY later. When I'm at home. My hour's up! Later peeps!
Posted by B at 4:20 PM
Sunday, January 6, 2008
060108 - First Service Multiplied
Alright, went for service today and saw Pastor Kong again! YAY! He said that for the next month, he would be preaching about the 4 'F's. 1 F for each week. This week's 'F' is FOCUS! Something I never was really good at... Well... In the area of studies that is. I never could concentrate too well on the textbook. Letting my mind wonder.But, I still managed to get 'good' grades. But this year. This year, I don't think I'll be able to let my mind wonder too much. Besides sitting in the front row, Jodie, who is sitting next to me, is quite quiet. I should be able to get some work done.
Yeah, anyways... If we focus on what we want, we can have it. For sure. I have to stay focused on my purpose. And you know, the big question nowadays is: "What am I here for?"
If you think that life is not worth living, that there is nothing to live for, why do you live? So, Pastor Kong told us that the question shouldn't be "What am I here for?" but rather "Whom am I here for?" When he said that, I was like: "Wow..." It is so amazing. So true. Someone out there in the world needs you. They NEED you! You are living for that person. To fulfill that need.
Anyways, the new Harvest Times just came out. And the Breakaway Youth Camp pictures are inside!! I saw Ayron, Kelvin, Cynthia, Christina, small Christina and Hui Mei. And Lokies' words were put at the top right. After service, we celebrated Warrick's 18th Birthday at the 4th floor. Got to see the other members again too! So good to see them! It was so strange... Only needing to book 12 seats... We used to need 2-3 rows... Now we only need 1. *Sigh*
Kelvin spoke to Sara and I after service. Reminding us that we are the only 2 girls. He told me that when the BIG W363 started, there were only 2-3 girls also. And now... Well... Then we all went to the coffee shop opposite the church. We played Heart Attack. SO FUN! HAHAHAHAHHAHA!
Then they went over to Carol's house while I went home. I had to reach home by 5. I got home, bathed and am now blogging. When you think about it, not much really happened today. Well... Generally, not much happened but technically, A LOT happened. XD
Posted by B at 5:34 PM
060108 - My Strange Dream... Remembering WWE
Previous blog, I said I had this strange dream. Well, I'm fully awake now to blog about it. Well, as I said, the dream had many flashes, like memories. 2 nights ago, there weren't a lot of flashes. Just a few. I took a nap again yesterday. THAT nap brought back a lot of memories and flashes.First dream, 2 nights ago. There was Joshua, Bertram and Schumann. We were at the Expo. Joshua was in a white collar shirt that had blue-black stripes on it. Schumann was in a black shirt with a white vest. Bertram was in a white collar shirt with stripes also. They were just hanging around. Joshua was sitting next to Bertram and talking to him. Schumann was playing with a PSP. Nothing special. But that one, I don't know for sure if it really took place in real life.
Then the second dream, the one I had when I took my nap. I saw almost everyone in that dream. First memory was at Bertram's house. At the soccer/basketball court. Pepsi rammed the ball into me... -.- Yeah, anyways, then we were at the BBQ with W279. The one at West Coast. Yeah, we were playing the last game. The prisoner one? Where we had to stop the people from saving the prisoner. Our team, Team 6, were doing an okay job! YAY!
Then we were back at NTU. Laughing oh so hard. Then I saw Joel screaming again. And then the Breakaway Youth Camp. The strange thing is that these events REALLY took place in REALITY. But the first dream I had, those flashes didn't take place. I had a lot more flashes. And when I woke up, I felt so awkward. Like: "What just happened?"
I suppose it's just a side effect from missing them! Haha! And I was scared. Instead of it being a dream, it was more like a nightmare. And I asked myself why. They are my brothers and sisters. Why should I be afraid? And I honestly didn't know why. It was so scary. Each flash didn't have more than 1 second. It was so, so fast. I was so, so scared. When I woke up, my heart was racing. I was sweating.
Hey, but who cares, right? It was just a dream and nothing more. When I thought that, I felt a bit relieved. Barely, but still relieved none the less. Those dreams made me miss the cell group even more. Yesterday, during the movie, it was so awkward. So many people weren't here. Like Carol, Christina, etc. It was really, really awkward then.
But I just ignored it and watched the movie as the casted away guy tried to get rid of a toothache, putting a ice skate into his mouth. Everyone screamed...
You know, I'm still very hyped up about dreams. I'm not referring to the dreams we get when we sleep. I'm referring to our goals. What we want to accomplish. I don't know... Could it be God reminding me? Reminding me to start chasing the dreams I once had. I just got back into wrestling. Is being a wreslter one of the "nominees" of future jobs again? I mean, I was so on fire for it back then! Why not now again? It's been about one year and a half since I really started watching it regularly.
I put on a wreslting video yesterday. New Year's Revolution was the name of the Pay-per-view. And it was for 2007!! The START of 2007!! GAH! I didn't realise it had been so long... And I miss it. How I always think: "Shawn Michaels, you better beat that guy!!"
\I thought about the first time I watched it in 2004. It was WrestlMania 21. In the Triple Threat Match between Shawn Michaels (YAYNESS), Christ Benoit and Tiple-H. I miss it... I miss all the Wednesdays when I stayed up late to watch it. How I would always moan and groan when they went into a commercial. I was so on fire!!
Then guess what happened? I started watching Naruto and forgot about WWE. Then I started watching Bleach, forgetting about Naruto. Haha!
But I'm back into it now. There's a lot of catching up for me to do. One whole year of catching up. I just miss it, that's all. Oh no... Am I going to have dreams about WWE now? XD
Posted by B at 8:47 AM
Saturday, January 5, 2008
050108 -
Last night, I had weird dreams. Dreams about Cell Group. They were like memories... Most of those flashes were at the Expo. Center slope. It was so awkward... The dreams are so awkward, I can't even bring myself to type it... I'm so tired... But, as I've said before, it'd feel strange without blogging...Shall share about these dreams another time. Today, our new W363, Cynthia and Karuna (Spelt correctly?) came over to watch a movie. Joel, Shyang Zhi and I watched some wrestling videos with DX. My favourite team EVER! GO DX! Ayron and Auntie Emely cooked friend riced and mee for us today. And we watched Cast Away. Awesome movie.
I just came back from sending them off yeah. Didn't do much today really. I'm just so tired... Till next time peeps.
Posted by B at 11:32 PM
Friday, January 4, 2008
040108 - Water Balloons, Red Indians, Face Paint and DREAMS!
Today is the last day of Orientation. We played some games and all. And we had a water balloon fight!! And man! Going to the Breakaway Youth Camp helped A LOT in strategy. The objective was to drench the other team's Chief. So, we had the girls protect the chief and the boys, including me and some other girls, bombarded the others. So we planned to wait for them to run out of water balloons first before we started fighting back!Our aim was better!! HAHA! They kept throwing, but we kept dodging and they kept missing! OH MAN! They then ran out of water balloons and we started throwing! I'm so proud of my water balloon! It burst in the air and wet everyone in its range. It was so beautiful. XD
Yeah, then we rehearsed our cheers, song and dance for the big Finale. The theme is Togetherness. So all the groups had to become Red Indians because they thought tribes always bond very close. So, yeah. We got our chieftess, Shobana. We dressed her up, got her a spear and a shield.
Then we went on stage to perform. We got in third place!! Bawika got in 2nd and Etchmin in 1st! We got sweets as prizes. =3
Then we went back to our classrooms with our form teachers. Guarani's, which is now 1N2, form teacher is Mr. Hoon. Yeah, I'm sitting in the front row. Won't be so easy for me to ... um... get distracted now. Hee...
We also got our timetables. And I found out today that the school TIE is only necessary for assemblies and such. We don't have to wear them for the entire day. YIPPEE! I made a couple of friends. But some girls still look at me in "that" way. Except now, their not thinking: "Ew. You're a girl who acts like a guy. Gross."
NOW, it's LIKE their thinking: "Why can't you be like the other girls in class? Unenthusiated? Not excited? LOW PROFILE? Let's leave all the cheering to the guys."
REALLY! -Sigh- Anyways, our team ICs then painted our faces. Not everyone because we ran out of time. Either that or some of them just didn't want their faces to be painted. But I'm hoping it's only because we ran out of time. =3
Yeah... Then some of them were impatient and tried getting the paint out with DRY tissue. But I INTENTIONALLY wanted to keep my markings on. I wanted to see what kind of reaction I'd get from the people on the bus. And Jennifer called me open-minded. I'm not sure what it means though...
The bus was really squeezy today. Thank goodness my house is only 20 minutes away. Then I listened to this song by Good Charlotte. And one part caught me. It said:
You say that I'm a dreamer. I say "You're a non-believer". Take out the light. Take out the light, start dreaming! blah blah blah...
DREAMS! YEEHAW! And it really just reminded me of so many things in the past. I came up with these silly ideas. But if you see past its silliness, it's actually rather brilliant! At least, that's what my friend told me... It may be stupid and silly and foolish but THEY WORK! And they stand out. But people just say: "Dream on!"
Well, guess what? I am still dreaming. I am still thinking. People hardly ever use my ideas. EVER! But... I have faith that one day people will hear my ideas and go: That's genius! Because, no one has ever said that to me before. As I said, my ideas may be foolish and might take a lot of work. But I can SEE it!
If I can SEE it, I can HAVE it! And so, I know for sure, that I will HAVE it one day! MUAHAHA!! Till next time peeps!
Posted by B at 5:16 PM
Thursday, January 3, 2008
031207 - I am a kite in the sky. Kite & Sky Appreciation!
Title says it all. You know... I recently started referring to myself as a kite. I guess it's time for me to just let it out now. =)Well... What are kites? Kites are things which soar through the sky, right? And I just thought of it this way: I'm a kite. And God is the Sky. All the kites soar in His presence. Reaching for greater heights. Ahem, back to kites. Shall talk about the Sky later. Or else it won't make sense. There are other kites in the world too. We soar through the sky, some of us lost, some of us connected. I know this may not make any sense now. Just let me explain.
What prevents a kite from flying away? A kite string, right? Kites are all beauitful, one way or another. We are ALL bright coloured kites. BUT! We are ALL also kite strings. I shall share why I think that way later.
What a kite needs is a kite string. If not, it will just be lost in the directionless solitude, cut off from any connection with the other kites! In the beginning, all kites were lost. Slowly, some of them found their kite strings. People they can trust. It could be a friend, a family member, a love, someone you might not even have met face-to-face.
What good will come out of matching a kite with a kite? A red kite cannot appreciate a yellow kite. Both are bright coloured. What the red kite needs is a kite string. A kite string that can appreciate the kite for its freedom and colour. At the same time, the kite appreciating the kite string. For it's strongness, ability to be so firm and gracious.
Together, both are confident and shall explore the world. God, as the Sky, saw how lost the kites were first. So then, He placed these kite strings in our lives. To help us from flying away. To secure us. To prevent us from being lost.
A kite string is that one special person you trust so much. That one special, oh so special person. They keep you safe, they love you. You can always count on them! They are always there! Whether you need them or not!
And who do we thank for placing these amazing strings into our lives? The Sky. God. He placed these strings into our lives. Your string could be the person you're working with. If so, believe me, it was not coincidence that you walked into that interview and got that job. It could be a person in the school that you so did not to go to. But you did! And it was not coincidence. It could be someone your friend introduced you to. It was not coincidence that you met that someone. It was Him who placed that person into your life! He meant for it to happen!
God saw that you were lost. He placed that person into your life so you could be on the right path again. The CORRECT path. The path you were meant to be on! The one which will lead to your destiny. To your success. There will be mountains on the path. But with your string, you can overcome these mountains. You can fly over these mountains. But! That will only happen only when you trust your string to guide you.
Okay, now to share why I think we are both kites and kite strings. A kite cannot stay a kite forever. Or it will just be a helpless person, relying on the kite string forever. A kite can then suddenly become a kite string to someone else. To another kite. So... from one end of the kite is the kite string which secures it to the ground. The first one. At the other end of the kite, is another string. Made from the kite itself. And THAT string connects to yet another kite. And that kite connects to another one and another one and another one and so on and so forth.
We ARE kites and kite strings. We have a string to connect us with the world. And we are also kite strings to connect others with the world. Never let anyone say other wise. We are all special to a person. It could be one person, 10, 100. Doesn't matter. Just know, there is definitely at least one person. And because of that one person, you can connect to thousands.
I am a kite. In the brilliant Sky. I am also a kite string which the Sky created. You are a kite. In the brilliant Sky. You are also a kite string which the Sky created. Just know, that you are special. =)
Posted by B at 5:19 PM
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
020108 - Today, I Met The "Plastics"
This, I can honestly say. I don't think any of my new classmates will be forgetting me anytime soon. Besides having the unusual name, Belle, I can proudly say I have contributed to today's activities!Let's start from the beginning. Mom drops me off and I sit outside the hall, not daring to go in because I don't know where to sit. This girl sits next to me and asks if I'm from the group Guarani, which I am! So I initiated a hand shake and BOOM! I just made a friend called Jodie. (Jody)
After assembly and all, we were led by our Orientation Group ICs back to our classrooms where we played ice breaker games. Double Whacko, Boom Boom Chiki and the blanket name game. Then we discussed about the finale of the orientation. Shall blog about it on Friday.
And I contributed a cheer! YAY! I'm a composer!
Yeah, and when introducing ourselves, someone mistook my "Belle" for "Bel" and thought my full name was Annabel. Some people started laughing and I heard someone (I'm not sure who) singing Jingle Bells quietly. Not doing a very good job because the person was snickering at the same time.
And my boyishness was quite clear today. I hang out with boys more than girls. The only girl I speak to is Jodie. Because, well, the other girls... They give me strange looks.
The looks as if saying: "Ew... I'm disgusted by you because you're a GIRL who plays BASKETBALL and hang out with GUYS."
But you know what? I don't care. =) I don't care. Because the only things that matter here is what God thinks of me. And if those girls think that I care about what they think of me, who do they think they are?! Gods?!
Everything that happens is according to God's will. So if I'm a girl (Thank God I am) who loves basketball and prefers hanging out with guys, it is who God wants me to be!
I was recently reading a book about these 2 sisters. The younger one, Maggie used to be a geek. Who didn't know what were heels or flip flops. She cared so much about what the girls thought of her, she changed completely. She became the most popular girl in school
Her older sister, Rose, is what you would call a nerd. Studies all the time, not what you'd called pretty or sparkly. But Rose didn't care. In the end, Maggie became the one who was working from store to store. The one who got kicked out of her apartment. The one who was always in lack of money.
While Rose had a brilliant career and a brilliant husband and a brilliant house. The "perfect" life. She was rich and became beautiful.
So, sometimes trying to be what other people want you to be ain't so hot. The next thing I say, you're gonna think: How cliche! But, have you ever realised that people think this phrase is so cliche that no one actually pays attention to it?
Alright, here goes. Being true to yourself and being who you are is what truly matters. How God created you to be. Some people hear it and say: "Wow..." but they don't apply it to their life! They still strive to be what other people want them to be!
I am NOT going to change myself just for a couple of girls. I am NOT going to change myself so I can be considered "cool" in their eyes. Because who cares about them?! I care about Him. What He thinks of me. Even if the whole school thinks of me in that way, well, bugger off! Let me live my life the way He wants it to be and I shall let you live your life!
I feel so refreshed! Getting that out of my system! WHOO! XD
